Acknowledging and healing grief in branding & entrepreneurship

I sent my girls off to their first day of 3rd and 7th grades a couple weeks ago, and it has me feeling philosophical (more than usual :) ). It seems like just yesterday they were taking their first steps, starting preschool, cheering for themselves when they got up from a fall... 

It's so easy to want to hold on, to shelter them and somehow keep them tiny and safe forever.  But letting them go and being in the present with them, even while acknowledging and honoring the grief that arises from the loss of what once was, is the only way they can find out who they truly are in this crazy experience of life.

Our businesses, brand, and art are no different.

To be fully in the present and in the essence of what wants to be created today, we have to be willing to let go and grieve the creations and identities of the past. 

For if we hold on, afraid to let go, afraid to change, afraid to move on from what was, our brands and creations become stale, less potent, and less aligned.  Because the energy has already changed, even if we're resistant to it.

Just like parenting - they're growing and changing whether we want to admit it or not!


So I ask...


Who were you before you became the you that stands in the mirror today?

What did she create?

What did he desire?

How did they express their soul's vision? 

Have you thanked them?

Have you grieved them?

If their dreams were not realized, have you acknowledged that loss?

If their vision has evolved and creations pivoted, have you grieved that too?

We can't create aligned brands with vines of the past choking out the seeds of who we've become, so let's clear out the cobwebs and detritus of our brands and businesses by honoring the losses so that beginnings have a clear soil in which to root.

I have spent much of the past few years intentionally engaging in grief rituals and support, both on my own and through the incredible community of Josea Tamira Crossley, Through the Dark Woods (affiliate link).  The difference it has made in my internal landscape has been nothing short of profound, and business and creative losses I had only previously brushed aside have received healing as well. 

So I offer a ritual adapted from my experiences:

Ritual for intentional grieving

• Make a list of all the endings that you want to honor.  

• Choose just one that feels particularly impactful (hint: it's usually the one you want to deal with the least)

• Set a timer for 5min and write non-stop using one of the following prompts from grief expert Frances Weller.  If your pen or brain pauses, restate the prompt and keep writing:

  • I remember...

  • I miss...

  • I am grateful for...

• Read what you wrote aloud, to yourself or to a safe other

• Dance and move your body for at least 5 min, letting your feelings dance you

• Offer your writings for transformation by releasing them - burn them, shred them, bury them, tear them and release them into the wind/water

• Engage in a self-soothing practice - humming and rubbing your arms, swaying, enjoying a cozy blanket and cup of tea, sitting in nature

If you're able to do it within a safe community it's even more powerful and effective.

May your endings lead to beautiful beginnings and may you know you are exactly where you need to be.